The Toy That Saved Christmas (transcript)
George: "...And so the pig and the giant lizard brought the boy back to his family at the bowling alley and they all lived happily ever after." The end. Annie: That was a neat story, Grandpa George. Can you tell me another one? George: Oh, I'd love to, Annie. But if you don't get some sleep, you're gonna be pooped tomorrow. And you know what tomorrow is? Annie: Christmas? George: That's right! So let's just close our little eyes... George: Ehhh... Oh, all right. I suppose 1 more story won't hurt. Besides, what are grandpas for, anyways? Annie: Oh, thank you, Grandpa George! George: Now let's see, a Christmas story... Oh, did I ever tell you about the town that didn't get Christmas? Annie: You mean they didn't have Christmas? George: No, I mean they didn't get Christmas. They had Christmas. They loved the packaging and the toys and everything, but they didn't understand what Christmas was really about! Now let's see, what was the name of that... Dinkletown! That's it! I used to deliver the mail there! (Cuts to daytime, George driving his truck down to Dinkletown.) (Captions "Big Idea Productions Presents" and the title "The Toy That Saved Christmas" comes up.) George: Now the kids of Dinkletown loved to see me around Christmas time 'cause they all thought they was getting something. (I Can't Believe It's Christmas) Laura: I can't believe it's Christmas I think I'm finally getting something Can't believe it's Christmas My favorite time of year! Percy: I can't believe it's Christmas Been dreaming of a sugar plum thing Can't believe it's Christmas Oh boy, it's finally here! Geroge: (as all the kids are hopping merrily around him) Whoa! Now wait a minute! I only got one package today, and it's for house number 4! Now let's see, which one's house number 4? Kids: Ho ho, away we go with rosy cheeks and hearts a-glowing Hey hey, our favorite day, it makes us wanna cheer Percy: Yo ho, we love the snow Li'l: At least we know we won't be moving Kids: Down hey we'd like to say that Christmas time is here! (The head of the snowman falls. George dodges quickly, but the package is sent hurling towards the roof of a house, stuck.) George: Uh-oh. Kids: We can't believe it's Christmas Been waiting for a million hours Can't believe it's Christmas Oh what a nifty day! We can't believe it's Christmas Lenny: Took 14 baths and 18 showers Kids: Can't believe it's Christmas And now it's time to play! We can't believe it's Christmas We think we're finally getting something Can't believe it's Christmas Our favorite time of year! We can't believe it's Christmas Been dreaming of a sugar plum thing Can't believe it's Christmas Oh boy it's finally... George: Oy, my spinely! Kids: Boy it's finally here! George: Where did the...? Oh, number 4. Well, that was easy. (George falls back down. Cuts to inside of the house, where the kids open up the package.) Laura: What is it? Junior: It's got a button! Lenny: Push it! Push it! (The button is pushed, forming a Christmas tree.) Kids: Ooooh! (Suddenly, a commercial is displayed on the TV.) Mr. Nezzer: Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas! Say, kids, have you got the don't know what I want for Christmas blues? Well, if I know anything about toys--and you know I do--I know just what you're looking for! You want a toy that's fun. You want a toy that's cute. But most of all, you want a toy with a fully functional buzzsaw built into its right arm. That's right - You want Buzzsaw Louie! Cool, huh? But wait, there's more! Buzzsaw Louie also knows the true meaning of Christmas. All you have to do is press his nose... Louie: Christmas is when you get stuff! You need more toys! Mr. Nezzer: Just as soon as your parents phone in and order Buzzsaw Louie, one of our trained penguins will deliver him right to your door! Announcer: Delivery not available to Puggslyville due to the collapse of the Puggslyville bridge. Mr. Nezzer: So take it from me, Mr. Nezzer--I mean Santa Claus and my little elf helper. Mr. Lunt: Look at me! I'm an elf! Mr. Nezzer: You just won't be happy until your parents get you a Buzzsaw Louie, the only toy with a working buzzsaw and the true meaning of Christmas. Louie: Billy has more toys than you! (Outside, the children are running over to their homes, whining and bickering.) Junior: Mom! Mom! I need more toys! (Cuts to Percy's house.) Percy: Billy has more toys than me! Dad Pea: Who's Billy? Percy: I don't know. But he has more toys than me! (Cuts to Laura's house.) Laura: I want a Buzzsaw Louie!! Lenny: I want 10 Buzzsaw Louies!! Both: 'Cause that's the true meaning of Christmas!!! Waaaaaahhhh!! (Mr. Nezzer is viewing upon the children's fidgeting.) Mr. Nezzer: Oh, it's working! It's working wonderfully! Mr. Lunt: What's working, boss? You mean you wanted those kids to be all whiney? Mr. Nezzer: Mm-hmm. Mr. Lunt: I don't get it, boss. Mr. Nezzer: You see, Mr. Lunt, the only way their parents would get them to stop whining is to buy them lots of toys. And as the owner of the Nezzer toy factory, I'll make out like a bandit! Mr. Lunt: Oh-ho, boss, you are very wily! Mr. Nezzer: More wily than my brother, Nebby K.? Mr. Lunt: You mean the one with the chocolate factory that I used to work for? Oh, you're much more wily than him! Mr. Nezzer: Good. Soon, everyone will know that Wally P. Nezzer is the wiliest Nezzer of them all! Mr. Lunt: Oh, there's no doubt about that, boss! Mr. Nezzer: Well, fire up the assembly line, Mr. Lunt! We got money to make, and that's what Christmas is all about! (Cuts back to Annie and George) Annie: That's not what Christmas is about! George: I know that, and you know that, but Wally P. Nezzer is a little confused. And thanks to his TV commercial, so was everybody else! The kids were whining and the toys were flying off the assembly line just like he planned. Annie: That must've been the worst Christmas ever. George: Oh, yes, it would've been, if it wasn't for what happened next. Annie: What? What happened? George: Well, as the toys were coming down the assembly line having their noses tested, one of them winced. Annie: Winced? George: He grimaced. Made a face. Didn't like the sound of the words that was coming out of his own head. Annie: But he was just a toy. George: Maybe he was wired different. Who knows? Anyways, that night while all the other toys were waiting to get sent out, he was doing some thinking. (Grumpy Kids) Louie: Grumpy kids, greedy dreams This is not what Christmas means I'm just a toy, I don't claim to be a genius, but there must be more to Christmas... There must be more to Christmas I think we're really missing something Must be more to Christmas... But... What? George: Yes, there had to be more. Louie didn't know what it was, but he figured it was about time somebody found out! (Louie pushes his box back until he falls off his shelf. A penguin flashes the flashlight over to investigate. Louie resumes his position as the light flashes over to him. The guard leaves and Louie breaks out of his box, heading for the door.) George: Now he'd never been out of the factory before. Why he'd never even been out of his box before! But he was a smart toy. How hard could it be? (Louie trips and falls, rolling in the snow, forming a giant snowball tumbling down the hill and crashes into the snow.) George: Maybe a little harder than he thought... "The Toy That Saved Christmas" will continue after this short break. (Silly Song: Oh Santa) George: And now, back to "The Toy That Saved Christmas." Junior: Yahoo! This is great! Larry: Yeah! Whee!!! Bob: Um, aren't we going a little fast? Larry: Look out for that tree! Bob: Tree? What tree? Junior: No problem! Hang on, guys! Bob: Why? Why do I need to hang on? (The trio ride their sled towards the screen as snow hits the camera.) Junior: That was fun! Larry: I want to do it again! Bob: You know, I really can't see anything from back here. Um, do you guys know where we're going? Larry: No idea! Never been here before! Junior: No one knows what lies around the next... (As they're sliding down the hill, they're heading towards the blockage of the Puggslyville bridge) Bail out! (Junior and Larry jump out of the sled) Bob: What? Hey, where's everybody... (Bob gasps as he runs smack into the blockage, Bob hits the snow.) Larry: Bob! Bob! Are you okay? Bob: Mouse Trap. Larry: Huh? Bob: I wanted to play Mouse Trap. You roll your dice, you move your mice. Nobody gets hurt. Larry: (Rolls his eyes, smiling. He spots the skull and crossbones on a sign) Hey! This must be the trail to the Puggslyville bridge! Bob: The what? Larry: That bridge that collapsed. You know, we heard about it on TV. Boy, we're sure lucky we didn't go down there. Junior: Guys, look what I found! Bob: That's a Buzzsaw Louie! Larry: Cool! Push his nose! Push his nose! Junior: Okay. Louie: You need more toys! Larry: Now that's the true meaning of Christmas! Louie: No it isn't! Junior: Who said that? Louie: I did. That's not what Christmas is about. Bob: It's not? Louie: No! Christmas isn't about whining and begging for more toys. Larry: Well, then what is it about? Louie: I don't know. But I'm gonna find out. I'm on an adventure! All: Oooh! Louie: Or at least I was, until I got stuck in that snow drift. Junior: Well, maybe we can help you. Bob: Hey, I know someone who's really, really smart. Maybe they can tell us what Christmas means! George: Well, they all thought it was a great idea, so they headed off together to see their smart person. Annie: Who was it? George: Well, um, it was... Uh... Me! Annie: (confused) You, Grandpa George? George: Don't act so surprised. (Cuts to Bob, Junior, Larry and Louie heading to George.) George: Yep, 3 boys and a funny little toy showed up at my front door, wondering if I knew the true meaning of Christmas. Annie: Well, did you? George: 'Course! But I didn't wanna just give it to them, so I read them a story from a very old book. (The Veggies and Louie sit back as George scrolls through the Bible.) George: Ah, here it is. "That night, in the fields near Bethlehem, some shepherds were guarding their sheep. All at once, an angel came down to them from the Lord, and the brightness of the Lord's glory flashed all around them. The shepherds were frightened. But the angel said, Don't be afraid. I have good news for you which will make everyone happy. This very day in King David's hometown, a savior was born for you. He is Christ the Lord. You will know who he is because you'll find him dressed in baby clothes and lying on a bed of hay. Suddenly, many other angels came down from heaven and joined in praising God. They said, Glory to God in the highest, and on Earth, peace; Good will toward men." (Bob, Larry, Junior and Louie all looked at each other with confusion.) George: Don't you see? That baby was Jesus! That night was the first Christmas! You see, God loved people so much that He gave his only son, so that everyone can be with him someday. (The Veggies and Louie nod in understanding.) George: Christmas isn't about getting. It's about giving! And it's especially about a little baby named Jesus, who was the greatest gift of all. (As the scene ends, we turn back to Annie.) Annie: You are smart, Grandpa George! Is that the end of the story? George: Oh, no. Now they knew what Christmas was about, but everybody else were still in the dark. (Cuts back to the center of Dinkletown, where the kids are still whining.) Percy: Waaaaah!! Buzzsaw Louie!!! Li'l Pea: Waaaaahh!!! Buzzsaw Louie!! Laura and Lenny: Aaaahhh!!! Buzzsaw Louie!!! (Both run into each other and fall to the ground) Waaaaaaahh!!! Junior: Oh, boy, it's gotten worse! We gotta tell Dinkletown what we know about Christmas! Bob: Yeah! Louie: But that TV commercial didn't just go to Dinkletown. It went everywhere! We gotta tell everybody! Bob: But Christmas is tomorrow. How can we possibly go everywhere? Larry: You can just forget about Puggslyville. The bridge is out. Louie: This is hopeless. Christmas is ruined! Junior: No, there must be a way. Keep thinking! (Bob, Louie and Larry pause to think very deeply, until Junior hatches an idea.) Junior: I got it! Bob/Larry/Louie: Huh? Junior: We gotta get into that toy factory! Follow me, everyone! We can save Christmas! (Cuts to the Veggies and Louie in front of the factory) Bob: I still don't understand why we're here. Louie: Yeah. I just got out of this place. I don't wanna go back in! Junior: Shh!! You'll just have to trust me. It's the only way... (Junior, Louie, Bob and Larry sneak their way into the factory, through the toy room, pass the Penguin scrubbing the dishes who turns just as they all pass him, not spotting them in sight.) Junior: It's gotta be around here somewhere! Junior: That's it! (The Veggies and Louie open up as the lits dim in the dark room.) Bob: Why, this is a... Louie: It's a... (Cuts to George and Annie.) Annie: (confused) TV studio? George: That's right! It was Mr. Nezzer's tellyvision studio! (Cuts back to the story, Larry controlling the camera as Junior stands in front of it.) George: Now Junior figured that since it was a TV commercial that got them into this mess, maybe another TV commercial could get them out of it! Well, here's hoping... (Louie flips the switch, turning on the broadcasting service as Junior begins his announcement.) Junior: Attention everyone! This is Junior Asparagus from Dinkletown with an important message - We were wrong about Christmas! Christmas isn't about being selfish and begging for more toys. Well, not that toys are bad, I have a few myself that I enjoy very much. But you see, there's much more to Christmas! Louie? Louie: Thank you, Junior. Li'l Pea: (watching the broadcast with the Pea family) Hey, it's Buzzsaw Louie! Louie: Listen, everybody. When it comes to Christmas... George: Now Louie told them about the true meaning of Christmas. About God's love, and the baby Jesus. About how giving very often makes us feel better than getting. Knowing the truth about Christmas made everybody very happy. Well, almost everybody... (Cuts to Mr. Nezzer, discouraged by the happy faces of Dinkletown.) Mr. Nezzer: They're not whining. Why aren't they whining? Mr. Lunt: I don't know, boss. (Mr. Nezzer resumes watching from his telescope, spotting Louie on the TV screen.) Louie: ...so this Christmas, instead of whining for more toys, let's try to be thankful for our families... Mr. Nezzer: Hmm... That's my toy. That's my TV studio! Mr. Lunt, somebody's trying to ruin my Christmas!! (Cuts back to Louie and Junior, ending their broadcast.) Louie: So you see, that's what Christmas is really about. Junior: And if we remember that, this will be the best Christmas ever! (Mr. Nezzer and Mr. Lunt march into the TV studio with the penguins.) Mr. Nezzer: Decided to borrow my TV studio, huh? Uh oh! It looks like we're about to experience some technical difficulties! Louie: No! Don't! (The TV screen shows Junior and Louie being surrounded by the penguins just as the screen turns to static. Dad Carrot looks over to see Nezzer's toy factory. We then cut to the Veggies and Louie, tied up in a sled.) Mr. Nezzer: So you're the guys who wanna ruin my Christmas! Bob: N-n-no, that's not it at all! We just want everyone to know what Christmas is really about! Mr. Nezzer: Do you think they care? Bob: Well... Mr. Nezzer: Do you really think they care all about that giving and love stuff? Bob: (uncertain) Well... Mr. Nezzer: Listen, the only thing kids wanna know about Christmas is that they're gonna get more toys, and I intend to keep it that way. That's why I'm gonna have to send you boys on a little trip. Let's see. Where would you like to go? Wibblestown? Bumblyburg? Larry: Just don't send us to Puggslyville. The bridge is out. Mr: Nezzer: Puggslyville! Oh, I hear it's nice this time of year! Mr. Lunt, 4 tickets to Puggslyville, please! Mr. Lunt: Right away, boss! Louie: (at Larry) Way to go. (The troubled four are sent right to the exit leading to Puggslyville.) Mr. Nezzer: The plunger, Mr. Lunt! (the plunger is pulled back, prepared to push them) Now on my signal... Three... Two... One last thing. If those people really cared about what you had to say, where are they now? Dad Asparagus: We're right here! Mr. Nezzer: Huh? (All the families of Dinkletown appear right before Mr. Nezzer.) Dad Asparagus: We care very much about the true meaning of Christmas, Mr. Nezzer! Dad Carrot: That's why we came here - To give you what you deserve! Mr. Nezzer: (innocently) Wha--wha--oh! You didn't really think I was gonna... heh... oh, that was just... just a joke! I wouldn't... (guilty) What are you gonna do...? Laura: (confronts Mr. Nezzer with a stern face) Mr. Nezzer... (now with a smile, handing him a present) Merry Christmas! Mr. Nezzer: Huh...? Is that for me...? (opens up the present) Oh, it's a little bear! Oh, I always wanted a Christmas present, but we were too poor! You don't know how happy this makes me! Look! Isn't it cute? Bob/Larry/Junior/Louie: (nodding) Uh-huh! Uh-huh! George: Annie, it was a great Christmas. (Cuts to Dinkletown, at night time.) George: The next day, everyone got together to exchange gifts. Why, even Mr. Nezzer was there! (We see silhouettes of everyone inside the house.) Bob: Oh, Mr. Nezzer! How did you know? Mr. Nezzer: Oh, I have one just like that back home. Bob: It's just what I've always wanted! Mr. Nezzer: You can take it back if it doesn't fit. Annie: What about Louie? What happened to him? George: Well, he ended up living in Dinkletown. At first, he wanted to have his buzzsaw surgically removed so nobody would get hurt. But then he finally figured out what it was good for. Annie: What? George: Making furniture! (We see a smaller house and the silhouette of Louie by the window, carving the wood.) George: Why, he filled Dinkletown with new tables and chairs and hunges and spice racks and those little things you hang your mugs on and... Well, you get the picture. Louie: I need more wood!! George: But the best part of all is that they finally knew what Christmas really meant! And they just couldn't stop thinking about it and talking about it and even singing about it. (We hear the French Peas singing He is Born The Holy Child.) George: Yep, it was the best Christmas ever. Category:Episodes transcripts